Week 4.
The past week I have made a point to get outside (by myself) for a morning walk every day. During this time, I will chat with old friends on the phone or listen to books that are long overdue on my reading list.
This week in particular, I have been participating in a 21-day meditation with Oprah and Deepak Chopra. They are short 20 minute meditations entitled "Hope in Uncertain Times." I figured I could really use more of that.
One quote that I really loved was this:
Hope and fear cannot occupy the same space. Invite one to stay.
It reminded me that right now, we live in uncertain times and we really do have a choice of how we choose to see things. Hope vs. Fear.
There was one day this week where I kicked over my glass half full and started getting all freaked out about the worst case scenario. I tend to consider myself a realist for the most part, but this day in particular, I lost my center. I got so in my head about all the "what if's" and the "if only's" that I started feeling so scared and so alone. I felt all the isolation of our social distancing and I was convinced that at any moment I would see a group of zombies storming the neighborhood.
I didn't like that. It felt terrible.
And I didn't think that doing a 20 minute meditation on hope could bring me back from the cliff I metaphorically jumped off . But then I heard that quote. I realized I had a choice between hope and fear. Ironically there's not really a grey area between the two.
So I tried it.
For me, choosing hope was way harder than choosing fear. I had to keep my mind in the present moment and not catastrophize the unknown. That was so hard!!! Trying to see the best in others and not judge them when they weren't 6 feet apart was really eating at me. But I kept coming back to hope. That we are currently ok. We currently have enough food. We currently have shelter. We currently get to sleep in. There are currently no zombies. And even though I was exhausted after all the mental gymnastics, the truth is, I felt better. Not like rainbows and unicorns-better, but better than the day of fear.
In the end, hope always wins. It's hard to cultivate, but man, it's easier to see the joy in the moment than trying to hide from zombies.
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